Dear T,
Your husband must be a Democrat accusing you of doing what he is doing. But are you sure of your source? The lodge probably won’t care and will think less of you for repeating gossip. As an ill woman with three children, you should be very careful about rejecting the Lodge’s insurance.
The Lodge could put you out is you violate rules. Get a friend with a machine to drive you to the ball, sit outside and watch for your husband’s shenanigans.