Poll

This is a real scenario.  Regarding the salutation, "Have a nice day", GD believes

It is polite.
0 (0%)
It is too commanding.
0 (0%)
It is juvenile.
0 (0%)
No one actually means it.
0 (0%)

Total Members Voted: 0

Voting closed: January 28, 2019, 01:49:27 AM

Author Topic: Living With Grandma's Daughter  (Read 25122 times)

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Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #75 on: January 22, 2019, 12:31:21 AM »
Unless you specifically sign a contract with a buyer’s agent (in states that allow that) ALL realtors represent the seller. No matter what they say. The seller pays their commission. Doesn’t matter if they work for the same agency or not. They are going to talk the buyer into the highest possible offer. Their commission is based on selling price.
That's right!  Perfectly stated.

Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #76 on: January 22, 2019, 12:36:26 AM »
OK, I am confused which is not hard to do to me but, does she live with you or you live with her?
I am well over the hill, & I recently moved in with her out of sheer, utter desperation after several tough years of barely hanging on as a renter.

And KSM is full of it!  I know no Ted nor any rooster, although roosters are fine with me.

I am glad my father-in-law does not read this or he would invite one of them to live with him,, that is just the way he is.
He's full of redeeming qualities...  :)

Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #77 on: February 03, 2019, 12:16:52 AM »
She scorched a ceramic frying pan making a meal with gluten in it, which I can't eat.  And, to her, somehow that translated into her thinking I should scrub the pan.  Wow.  In a house without a metal scrubber with a handle.  Super wow.

In a 15-minute period recently, she told me I will probably be moving soon with her.  And in the next breath told me things are not going well between us and I must move out, "immediately".  For Heaven's sake.  Perhaps we are on the road to memory care.

I don't like memory care facilities.  I don't think I would be a good fit.  They need to start building them around extremely large courtyards, so residents can really go outside entirely and not be locked up all day.  A courtyard would be a great way to keep residents confined for their own safety, while still having that feel of the great outdoors.  Also, they could put memory care facilities on larger pieces of land and just fence them.  But, most memory cares I've seen are just one part of a larger overall retirement community, so there isn't much room on the land left for memory care courtyards or fenced grounds.

Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #78 on: February 04, 2019, 12:58:16 AM »
I think she's either washing her hands more, or someone went around and washed all the common handles, knobs, switches, etc...  A nice turn of events.

Azzerae

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #79 on: February 04, 2019, 03:55:42 AM »
At one point, for a couple months, I had agreed to help my mother out by caring for my grandmother. This meant she lived with me for those 3 months. I'm good with old folks and luckily am a patient person, but by the end of those couple months, I was absolutely exhausted and near suicidal.

Of course, when you love someone, and they're your family you're prepared to take a lot of guff from them. But many of the things you make mention of in your posts here are relateable ... old folks can be hard and unfeeling, and get stuck in their way of doing things - regardless of that impeding anyone else or their lives.

Good on you for taking so much of this stuff on the chin, and in your stride.
not well-liked, but right

Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #80 on: February 04, 2019, 05:24:14 PM »
At one point, for a couple months, I had agreed to help my mother out by caring for my grandmother. This meant she lived with me for those 3 months. I'm good with old folks and luckily am a patient person, but by the end of those couple months, I was absolutely exhausted and near suicidal.

Of course, when you love someone, and they're your family you're prepared to take a lot of guff from them. But many of the things you make mention of in your posts here are relateable ... old folks can be hard and unfeeling, and get stuck in their way of doing things - regardless of that impeding anyone else or their lives.

Good on you for taking so much of this stuff on the chin, and in your stride.
Thanks.  Congratulations on helping your mother!  Yes, it's true.  Any times I do something differently than her (even something as small as changing the washing machine setting or putting the flatware holder back in the dish washer facing forward), it is viewed as "trying to change everything".  Whew.

Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #81 on: February 04, 2019, 05:48:21 PM »
The woman who raged for half an hour when I said "when" at 3/4 cup of coffee as she poured... wanted to talk about boundaries today.  This, the lady who nearly ripped my door of its hinge last month, who double parks in front of the garage so I can't park at all, who once mistakenly locked me out for 4 hours and took her grand ole time coming back even though she wasn't doing anything important.  She knowingly controls the remote, flipping channels catywampus however she likes, and going into an angry tizzy if the TV is on the music channel.  Well, today she, that woman, the woman of no boundaries and total control, wanted to talk about personal space and boundaries.  Wow.  So we did.  Just wow.

We talked about how she shoved me yesterday while trying to reach the microwave as I was leaning and bending into the fridge from the side.  I told her (truthfully) that she had hurt me.  She replied, "Well, what would you have me do then?"  I said she could get my attention and tell me she needs to pass by, or she could just wait 20 seconds (as I often do for her but I didn't say that).  Weird - what kind of person doesn't intuitively know this?  And, what kind of person just always seems to need the microwave or the kitchen right as I am throwing together a sack lunch and trying to get out the door?  She has hours and hours and hours alone in the house, yet suddenly just when I need a resource, all of the sudden, she does too.  I don't even know if it's conscious.

She was upset because the other day in the dark just as she got home, I tried to show her a short cut with the TV/music remote.  It was dark and I failed to see her body language until she told me to back off, at which point of course I did.  I was just being eager to help.

I think she's just upset bec I've been working a little more and can't play Cinderella.
 
She actually insinuated that I, on the other hand, have no right to boundaries because I am in her home out of her charity due to my hardship.  In other words, she was basically saying only people with money deserve boundaries.  Wow.  So, I guess by that reasoning, it would be considered okay to abuse poor folks.

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She knows I could use more work and yet refuses to mention to any of her many acquaintences and neighbors that I am available to clean homes.  I asked why.  She said, "Because you won't mop crevices on your hands and knees, and you require telescoping tools to clean windows".  Seriously?  Both care giving companies I have worked for have forbid employees to mop on their hands and knees.  And everyone I know uses telescoping sponge/squeegees to clean windows.  Not a ladder, ammonia and newsprint.

I bought her a mop (and broom and vacuum) because she didn't have one.  I've used it many times.  I mop a lot.  Yet, I guess one time she saw me spot clean with a rag.  Today she said she cannot recommend me for mopping because I just wipe spots with a rag.  OMG.  I reminded her I bought her the mop, & that I use it all the time.  When I moved in, her place was very dirty.  It has been very clean for many months.  She admits it.

But she can't bring herself to recommend me to clean homes.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The moment I woke up and had not even had a sip of my coffee and decaf mix, she told me she wanted to tell me something serious.  I told her I had been white knuckling pain the last 5 hours (as she should damn well know) and bargained for a few minutes to get a little caffeine in me before her tirade.  She said it's time for me to move out.  Okay, I'll call the limo.

She doesn't get it. 

KSM

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #82 on: February 04, 2019, 10:33:24 PM »

And KSM is full of it!  I know no Ted nor any rooster, although roosters are fine with me.
He's full of redeeming qualities...  :)
LOLOL  Somehow that just makes it all worth it.  :)


rooster ;D

Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #83 on: February 05, 2019, 12:03:16 AM »
The redeeming qualities comment was about Astrob*tch's father-in-law!

KSM

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #84 on: February 05, 2019, 12:49:18 AM »
The redeeming qualities comment was about Astrob*tch's father-in-law!
I am and was aware of that! It's the other part ::) ::) ::) ::)

Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #85 on: February 05, 2019, 08:41:38 PM »
I am and was aware of that! It's the other part ::) ::) ::) ::)
Okay so you're not a block head.

Today went well.  Until this evening when I confided in a sibling about the time GD tried to take my closed door down.  Perhaps I should not have confided, because said sibling immediately called GD & she abruptly left the house in her car almost 3 hours ago.  She gossips maliciously about me all the time.  All I did was confide a truth.  Since she's been gone so long and it's close to freezing outside, I can only assume she has gone to cry wolf over at yet another sibling's house, something she has done once before.  It's deceptive of her to do that.  Hopefully they see through the deception.  I shouldn't have to be on pins and needles tonight, nor walk on eggshells every day.  She sure likes drama and attention.  I vacuumed in case she comes back tonight so she'll know I'm peaceful.  All I did was make a disclosure to someone.

KSM

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #86 on: February 05, 2019, 08:51:54 PM »
Okay so you're not a block head.

Today went well.  Until this evening when I confided in a sibling about the time GD tried to take my closed door down.  Perhaps I should not have confided, because said sibling immediately called GD & she abruptly left the house in her car almost 3 hours ago.  She gossips maliciously about me all the time.  All I did was confide a truth.  Since she's been gone so long and it's close to freezing outside, I can only assume she has gone to cry wolf over at yet another sibling's house, something she has done once before.  It's deceptive of her to do that.  Hopefully they see through the deception.  I shouldn't have to be on pins and needles tonight, nor walk on eggshells every day.  She sure likes drama and attention.  I vacuumed in case she comes back tonight so she'll know I'm peaceful.  All I did was make a disclosure to someone.
If I am a block head everybody should try it. It's pretty good ;)

The drama you're describing has me harkening back to high school or even earlier, good Lord. These people will eventually hang themselves in one way or the other as they're too stupid to realize they are their own worst enemy.  Have you considered stabbing them?

Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #87 on: February 06, 2019, 03:59:33 PM »
If I am a block head everybody should try it. It's pretty good ;)

The drama you're describing has me harkening back to high school or even earlier, good Lord. These people will eventually hang themselves in one way or the other as they're too stupid to realize they are their own worst enemy.  Have you considered stabbing them?
No, I wish harm on no  one.  She has always been a plagued woman and now that she's older she gets attention out of it.  My only goal other than Christian is to keep a roof over my and my elderly cat's head until I can re-build my financial life.  I ordered my first "senior" product yesterday - ha ha.  Free checks once a year for seniors.  I can't believe I'm there now.

I never thought you'd be my moralizer.  It wasn't always this way between us.  I became more tolerant.  What happened to you?

Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #88 on: February 07, 2019, 01:30:18 AM »
GD is off her rocker.  One day she tells someone I'm "developmentally disabled" (So much for Honor Roll) lol then the next day she tells someone I'm "schizoid" omg and today she gave me a brochure to help me with opiod addiction.  I'm not even sure what an opiod is and I just sailed through a random drug test for my job!  Not to mention having a career in behavioral health!  She makes no sense.  She has even told people I saw a UFO as a child, which is not true at all!  She is just nuts.

One time my attorney asked her to testify about my good character.  GD tried to start her testimony with, "Well, the weirdest thing I remember about Sophia would be..."  so the attorney of course cut her off and did not use her testimony in court.  She is ridiculous.  I asked her to finish her sentence and she said she had wanted to talk about the UFO.  There never was any UFO.  I am living in the Twilight Zone.


Sofia

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Re: Living With Grandma's Daughter
« Reply #89 on: February 07, 2019, 09:28:06 PM »
Made it through another day.

I told a relative about her attacking my door one night.  When she found out I had disclosed it, she retaliated very heavily.  So yesterday was full of negative surprises.  However, that was then and this is now.