Ask Bart Anything

[Kidnostad]

Just keep the finger there until it grows enough for you to cut under the finger and still have your full Magnum P.I. stache.
PS- Gorillas have the smallest dicks of all the primates.

Wow!  I would never have thought of that.  You da man, Bart!

[TigerLily]

Youse guys have been talking beer! Bart. With your kind permission I will quote myself from a different thread. I started the beer review questioning Kid but left my favorites in a different thread thinking the topic was long gone. I forget how much slower the world is outside the Heater thread

 [Somewhat edited to keep apolitical] Hey, Kid.  Wanted to get back to you to finish our conversation about Our Favorite Beers. My top three are Modelo Negro, Amstel Light and Samuel Adams.  I drink around three beers a year to celebrate the NFL playoffs. Last year I bought a six pack of Modelo Negro for the Playoffs and Super Bowl. I still have 3 left

[Walks_At_Night]

Dear Bart,

Just pulled these two Ads.   Should I take a break from Ellgab and go shoot a squirrel or something?

[wr250]

Dear Bart,

Just pulled these two Ads.   Should I take a break from Ellgab and go shoot a squirrel or something?

no shooting @zeebo

[tootsie_wootsy]

Dear Bart,
How did my karma (not that I am complaining) jump 100 points to 592 in the middle of the night and your karma go down to 11?  I am very confused and concerned at this strange turn of events (even though i am the beneficiary).. I humbly admit i do not deserve such high karma and you deserve all the karma to be gotten.  Thanks for looking into this odd matter... TW  Praise BE

[Bart Ell]

Dear Bart,
How did my karma (not that I am complaining) jump 100 points to 592 and your karma go down to 11?  I am very confused and concerned at this strange turn of events (even though i am the beneficiary).. I humbly admit i do not deserve such high karma and you deserve all the karma to be gotten.  Thanks for looking into this odd matter... TW  Praise BE

Somebody asked if I could share their karma with others, you were one they wanted to share with.
As a plot twist I then gave that person all my karma.

[ponyboysunset]

Somebody asked if I could share their karma with others, you were one they wanted to share with.
As a plot twist I then gave that person all my karma.

That's pretty cool!

[tootsie_wootsy]

Somebody asked if I could share their karma with others, you were one they wanted to share with.
As a plot twist I then gave that person all my karma.

Thanks to you and my benefactor, the person who asked  to share their karma with me. They are my unknown hero/heroine as you are..  I really thought this was all a dream  ... I am grateful and thankful..... Love, TW 

[paladin1991]

I seem to recall when it first came out they did, sorta, use that advertising campaign. Not as overtly as the great Old Milwaukee campaigns, of course, but had folks toobin' in the Guadalupe (maybe SM, Comal, or Frio) and featured a gal in a bikini top and a side-boob shot. But not overtly as a Swedish Bikini Team parachuting into your fishing camp and wanting to party.

This doesn't happen for you?  sound's like you're fishin' in the wrong holes, good buddy.

[paladin1991]

I quit drinking before the whole craft beer thing. And in spite of my germanic last name I never developed an appreciation of beer. Maybe I started drinking too early with Drewery’s, Hamms, Old Style and Pabst Blue Ribbon. I either tolerated a beer or I hated it.

3 notable beers I did enjoy. Molson Red (circa 1976), Tecate’ (circa 1982) and Old Style in a frosted mug where the ice forms in the beer on a hot day while listening to the Cubs trying to beat the Cardinals to clinch their division.

Beers I REALLY hated. Lablatts, Shaeffer, Genisee Cream Ale

'Sucks' is a German last name?  Oh, I bet they 'Americanized it at Ellis Island.  Die Familie Saugen.  Hmmmm, I think it works for you either way.

And, because there can be 25 or more genders, I think now is the time to reclaim your cultural heritage.  In this time of tolerance (with a little t) you would be accepted by at least a dozen or so of those genders.  And me too.   

[paladin1991]

Popular regional beers when I was a young'un were Narragansett (Gansett) Rheingold, Piels, Ballantine (Double L) Shaeffer and of course there were also the major Milwaukee breweriew.   Never developed a real favorite as it was an occasional thing and pretty much boiled down to what you could get from older kids who could by it.  But I seem to recall drinking PBR more than anything else.   Since then, I've drunk a lot of beer in a lot of places--even San Miquel, God help me.

PBR.  Fond little league memories.  Our team delinquent would steal a can or two fm his fathers fridge in the garage.  Bring the goods to LL practice and we would sit in Right Field passing the cans back and forth until the coach would threaten us with 'sprints until you die!'

[paladin1991]

PBR is interesting as the first industrial beer to be embraced ironically by my generation as a reaction against craft-brewery elitism.  I had a different experience -- my first beer was a Beamish my older brother bought for me at a pub that flew it in weekly, so you might say I was born into snobbery.  Still, I say beer is like water when you're thirsty -- you're usually grateful, no matter what it is.

Spoken like a Fucking Man.

[paladin1991]

San Miguel really is atrocious. I don't know how they persuade those cats to crouch over so many bottles.

I don't even know what to say about your fucking beer.  Unless it's, "You're buying."

[paladin1991]

My first and only experience with San Miquel was on Guam or "Gum".  It tasted a little odd but when I came down with a case of "San Miguel Shits" I was certain that there would be nothing left of me but asshole and eyebrows.  I understand that nowadays it is a respectable beer with a world-wide following.  They must have found the source of the bacterium.

Or maybe they just manufacture it outside of the P.I.     Maybe it really "...is the water, and a whole lot more!"

[JUAN]

Where I grew up we had only PBR and Bud, and to step up, Wild Russian Vanya.