Ask Bart Anything

[GrumpyOldMan]

Dear Bart,

What's with these Vimeo ads advertising a billion colors with HDR video?  Back in my day, the men were men and the monitors were monochrome.  Whatever happened to ASCII smut?

[Walks_At_Night]

Bart,

The lunch topic for the lunch crew in the Cafeteria at work today was:

"Who would you rather be with:  Boof from Teen Wolf or Jordan from Real Genius?" 

Boof
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Jordan
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I, as well as most of the boys, were on Team Boof. We had a real solid case I think.  However, the members of
Team Jordan were certainly vocal in their choice and made some excellent points...............

What say you on this matter of vital importance?

[Bart Ell]

Dear Bart,

What's with these Vimeo ads advertising a billion colors with HDR video?  Back in my day, the men were men and the monitors were monochrome.  Whatever happened to ASCII smut?

Here is some cave painting porn.
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[Bart Ell]

What say you on this matter of vital importance?

I don't know who these people are but the second one looks like she would probably be into the freakier stuff.

[Smeghead]

Dear Bart,

What coffee should I use and how should I prepare it?

[DynamoHum]

If I may interject here regarding coffee preparation, I found an excellent tut for it on YT:

[Bart Ell]

Dear Bart,

What coffee should I use and how should I prepare it?

Get some of that Taster's Choice Classic.
Fill a cup with milk.
Heat the cup of milk up for 3 minutes 20 seconds in the microwave.
Add 2 teaspoons of coffee as much sugar as you like.

[KSM]

as much sugar as you like.

That's how I got my wife.

[Dyna-X]

Get some of that Taster's Choice Classic.
Fill a cup with milk.
Heat the cup of milk up for 3 minutes 20 seconds in the microwave.
Add 2 teaspoons of coffee as much sugar as you like.

I guess I'll stay with the Space Coffee being lactose intolerant, but great to see another Taster's Choice fan

[Smeghead]

Dear Bart,
 
  I work out with weights, use the treadmill and ride a bike.

What would you recommend for exercise along with a workout plan?

[Bart Ell]

Dear Bart,
 
  I work out with weights, use the treadmill and ride a bike.

What would you recommend for exercise along with a workout plan?

I do not recommend exercise.

Walk don't run.
Eat enough food for one person and not 5.
Daily orgasm.
Tickle your loved one.

[paladin1991]

Bart,

The lunch topic for the lunch crew in the Cafeteria at work today was:

"Who would you rather be with:  Boof from Teen Wolf or Jordan from Real Genius?" 

Boof
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Jordan
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I, as well as most of the boys, were on Team Boof. We had a real solid case I think.  However, the members of
Team Jordan were certainly vocal in their choice and made some excellent points...............

What say you on this matter of vital importance?

Me?  I always had a thing for Jordan.

[paladin1991]

Here is some cave painting porn.
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I can decipher this painting.  It is an early man depiction of an alien fire team.  Counting fm the left, First man is the primary  radio operator.  You can see the radio antennae at a 45 degree angle over his back.  Number 2, leading the team, is the Team Leader, he is designated by the ring around his chest.  Number 3 man is the assistant team leader, that is why his arm is linked to the team leader. He is also depicted as a 'rifle man' by the wedge like arrow design.  Number 4 man is a basic 'rifle man' with the same design as number 3 man.  Number 5, is the newbie, he is the back up radio operator.  He is also carrying a box type affair which serves the purpose of a combat pack.  In there are the spare batteries for the radio, spare ammo, pogey bait and other assorted shit. (He was probably wondering why he signed up and how to get out of this chickenshit outfit. 'Join the Space Force and see the Galaxy!  It'll be fun.' they said.)

Mystery solve.

[sean92008]

Me?  I always had a thing for Jordan.

She was socially awkward enough that I can only imagine she would appreciate the attention and do anything for it...

[paladin1991]

Get some of that Taster's Choice Classic.
Fill a cup with milk.
Heat the cup of milk up for 3 minutes 20 seconds in the microwave.
Add 2 teaspoons of coffee as much sugar as you like.

That sounds French.  No karma for sounding French.