Whatever: The Open Lines Thread

[JUAN]

Tell her hey from all of us.

[sean92008]

I just spent a lovely three (3) hours with @PolkaDot here in Denver. She took me a few places as I had errands to run and have yet to purchase a new ride. We even had lunch together where I made her laugh several times. Some place with BACON in the title of it. She's almost too pleasant. But rest assured, knowing me will certainly stomp out some of that.

When will the poisoned drink kick in, @PolkaDot?

Buy a Subaru, @KSM!

[ShayP]

I just spent a lovely three (3) hours with @PolkaDot here in Denver. She took me a few places as I had errands to run and have yet to purchase a new ride. We even had lunch together where I made her laugh several times. Some place with BACON in the title of it. She's almost too pleasant. But rest assured, knowing me will certainly stomp out some of that.

Did you wear a shirt?

[KSM]

Did you wear a shirt?

I wore underwear. What more do ya' want from me? !

[ShayP]

I wore underwear. What more do ya' want from me? !

I want you to put on a damn shirt, and those unbuttoned vests don't count.  At least do it for the children.

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[sean92008]

[KSM]

Got clobbered last night by the parkade arm thingy that lifts up to let cars through and then closes for the next car to pay their entry fee. It came down right on my face, and if not for macho-hunky-pride I would've fallen like most men. What did I do? With blood trickling pouring down my face into my mouth and on my nice shirt, I still took Vera for her night walk!! When I got home and checked the damage I realized that I likely needed stitches. Fuck-it, I got Alo vera. Alo.. VERA!


NOT THE ACTUAL PARKING ARM THAT ATTACKED ME
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[ShayP]

Got clobbered last night by the parkade arm thingy that lifts up to let cars through and then closes for the next car to pay their entry fee. It came down right on my face, and if not for macho-hunky-pride I would've fallen like most men. What did I do? With blood trickling pouring down my face into my mouth and on my nice shirt, I still took Vera for her night walk!! When I got home and checked the damage I realized that I likely needed stitches. Fuck-it, I got Alo vera. Alo.. VERA!


NOT THE ACTUAL PARKING ARM THAT ATTACKED ME
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At least you had a shirt on.  But seriously, WTF?    Dude, if you get split open just wipe the blood off, pinch the wound and coat it in super glue.    It'll dry quickly and I doubt you will be poisoned.  I've done it four times and never had ill effects....or maybe I have? 

[PB]

Got clobbered last night by the parkade arm thingy that lifts up to let cars through and then closes for the next car to pay their entry fee. It came down right on my face, and if not for macho-hunky-pride I would've fallen like most men. What did I do? With blood trickling pouring down my face into my mouth and on my nice shirt, I still took Vera for her night walk!! When I got home and checked the damage I realized that I likely needed stitches. Fuck-it, I got Alo vera. Alo.. VERA!


NOT THE ACTUAL PARKING ARM THAT ATTACKED ME
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We really should issue a handbook to third world refugees on the modern dangers lurking around every corner.

Don't use metal utensils on teflon pans or put metal in the microwave.

[KSM]

At least you had a shirt on.  But seriously, WTF?    Dude, if you get split open just wipe the blood off, pinch the wound and coat it in super glue.    It'll dry quickly and I doubt you will be poisoned.  I've done it four times and never had ill effects....or maybe I have? 

HEY! SEXNOSE! I didn't have any superglue BECAUSE eye I HAVE YET TO GO SHOPPING FOR SUCH rare used things. But I had duct tape and toilet paper (for a Band-Aid) with the aforementioned creams and ointments. 
So I'm all good there, Slitbox! Thanks for the luuuuuuv 

[sean92008]

Dumping on @KSM seems so mean. He's from Canada, for christ sake...  It's a wonder he's made it this far.

Let's show him some support, repeat after me:

Rush, Trailer Park Boys, hockey, Norm MacDonald...

[sean92008]

Not in the Celebrity Deaths thread because she'll probably live...

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Also on TMZ:
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The only reason I read further was to see if it was a women's race.

[ShayP]

HEY! SEXNOSE! I didn't have any superglue BECAUSE eye I HAVE YET TO GO SHOPPING FOR SUCH rare used things. But I had duct tape and toilet paper (for a Band-Aid) with the aforementioned creams and ointments. 
So I'm all good there, Slitbox! Thanks for the luuuuuuv 

Well shit.  You should've just used your shirt since you're averse to wearing one.  Only use duct tape for warts, and toilet paper for your ass...unless you have to blow your nose while sitting on the porcelain throne.

LMFAO at "SEXNOSE." 

Sincerely yours,
Slitbox 

[ShayP]

Dumping on @KSM seems so mean. He's from Canada, for christ sake...  It's a wonder he's made it this far.

Let's show him some support, repeat after me:

Rush, Trailer Park Boys, hockey, Norm MacDonald...

You forgot Triumph, Bryan Adams, SCTV, and The Red Green Show.  Oh...and Corner Gas.

[ShayP]

Not in the Celebrity Deaths thread because she'll probably live...

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That came across as disappointment.