Ask Bart Anything

[Bart Ell]

Well. Satan Incarnate anyway.
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My only memory of that prick is the 1989 Stanley Cup finals.

[Bart Ell]

I think PB lives in Berkeley. An awesome city which, of course he hates. I suggest we save Berkeley and just nuke PB. But it has to be a dud because I love irony

I believe he searches the internet using this exact phrase - "Show me things I hate so I can be happy today"

[TigerLily]

I believe he searches the internet using this exact phrase - "Show me things I hate so I can be happy today"

We're gonna need a bigger internet

[PB]

... They like to toss people into jail for a little bit of that bribe money...

What is the going rate for being caught throwing crumbly rock in Bulgaria?

[Bart Ell]

What is the going rate for being caught throwing crumbly rock in Bulgaria?

$180

[HamsterMuscle]

Sir Bart,

I just noticed that two of my pairs of underwear have small holes (not in critical areas).  How many holes are acceptable before they have to be retired?

[paladin1991]

1. Baltimore - I saw things there, man.
2. Austin - Fuckers try too hard to be weird.
3. Niagara Falls, NY - We just need the one.
4. Plovdiv, Bulgaria - I met the devil in a jail there and he was a trickster!
5. Gainesville, Florida - If it is the type of nuke that would eliminate a city and then pull the land to the north and south of it together then it would be great way to shorten that drive.
6. Adelaide, Australia - A city of cunts.
7. Ottumwa, Iowa - That little prick on MASH made me hate it.
8. Sacramento, California -  Shit city that ruins the state.
9. Koblenz, Germany - In 2017 they cancelled an event I was working because of a terrorist threat. I feel I owe them one.
10. Calgary, Alberta - Because fuck 'em.

Let's give Calgary a pass.  They have an all comedy station that has a signal that reaches around down here to Coeur d'Alene.

[paladin1991]

$180

Canadian or in real money?

[KSM]

Canadian or in real money?

Depends on the year. Under the Harper government, the Canadian $ was at times worth more than the U$.

[paladin1991]

Depends on the year. Under the Harper government, the Canadian $ was at times worth more than the U$.

You must be in 7th heaven making real money these days.  When are you going to become a CITIZEN?

[damon]

1. Baltimore - I saw things there, man.
2. Austin - Fuckers try too hard to be weird.
3. Niagara Falls, NY - We just need the one.
4. Plovdiv, Bulgaria - I met the devil in a jail there and he was a trickster!
5. Gainesville, Florida - If it is the type of nuke that would eliminate a city and then pull the land to the north and south of it together then it would be great way to shorten that drive.
6. Adelaide, Australia - A city of cunts.
7. Ottumwa, Iowa - That little prick on MASH made me hate it.
8. Sacramento, California -  Shit city that ruins the state.
9. Koblenz, Germany - In 2017 they cancelled an event I was working because of a terrorist threat. I feel I owe them one.
10. Calgary, Alberta - Because fuck 'em.

Yes Sacramento is a very shitty place that loves to ruin the rest of the state plus it gives It Steals money from the hard working people and gives it to useless pieces of shit like Falkie money. Fuck Sacramento. @Bart Ell How is your day going??

[Bart Ell]

Sir Bart,

I just noticed that two of my pairs of underwear have small holes (not in critical areas).  How many holes are acceptable before they have to be retired?

There can be dozens as long as the critical areas are protected.
You don't want to skid mark the white couch because your drawers have a hole at the pooper.

[paladin1991]

Yes Sacramento is a very shitty place that loves to ruin the rest of the state plus it gives It Steals money from the hard working people and gives it to useless pieces of shit like Falkie money. Fuck Sacramento. @Bart Ell How is your day going??

Damondo, the only thing left to save Cali is a cleansing fire.  Fm border to border to border to the sea.

Oh, and I am going fishing tomorrow.

[KSM]

You must be in 7th heaven making real money these days.  When are you going to become a CITIZEN?

No. Inslee's Washington in Biden's America is just as expensive as things were in BC with the exception of cheap, mass produced beer, and chicken drumsticks. I don't drink that beer but the drumsticks are great! Two years ago my reply would have read a lot differently as you can imagine.

I'm in Heaven for reasons other than the US dollar.

[HamsterMuscle]

I'm in Heaven

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