Ask Bart Anything

[KSM]

Like no way.   In case you have not noticed, the Wings are on the rise.  Just needed to get Lalonde out of there and Vrooom!!!!!!!
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AHH! Look at that! Catapulted to mediocrity.

Well.. we'll see.

[Walks_At_Night]

Catapulted to mediocrity.

Sucking middle of the pack tit for sure.  Still it is an improvement.

[Walks_At_Night]

Bart,

It seems like Ratty Patty might be coming over to Senda's pad to help him move Big Red.  As you may recall, Senda had to "whittle" some of the connectors when assembling Big Red because Mechanical Engineers are idiots.  I'm fairly confident that Senda isn't smart enough to empty Big Red to take the weight off it prior to the move and I am equally confident that Patty won't be motivated enough to do so.  Big Red is going to end up in a ruinous heap, isn't it?

[Walks_At_Night]

Bart,

An Estonian grocers opened up here recently.  Large footprint - absolutely stuffed with inventory.  Very pricey.  Don't see how they survive.  That is neither here nor there.  I picked up some Rye Bread.  It's frickin' delicious.  A million times better then Pepperidge Farm and a thousand times better then our local bakery.  What is the bread situation like there in Swaziland?  If it is as good as Estonian Rye bread I think I'd be Super Sized after a year.

[Walks_At_Night]

Bart,

I'm making a Wand of Crushing Despair.  I've got a chicken claw, feathers, a dowel and access to a woods.  This leads to many questions.
For the wand part of the wand [not sure of the proper terminology - handle? shaft? pole?]  is it better to use a dowel, sanded smooth and painted black or go out inna wood, find a branch, strip the bark, polish and cover it with varnish?  If I go with the dowel - which would better: Star and Moon decals or Runes of Ruin?  I don't they would work if the varnished branch was used.  Another question is how to attach the chicken claw to the wand part of the wand?  Drill a hole in the end and insert the claw and epoxy it in place?  Or bind everything together with a rustic twine and then harden it with varnish?  Similar question for feather attachment.

As always, thanks.....

[Bart Ell]

Bart,

It seems like Ratty Patty might be coming over to Senda's pad to help him move Big Red.  As you may recall, Senda had to "whittle" some of the connectors when assembling Big Red because Mechanical Engineers are idiots.  I'm fairly confident that Senda isn't smart enough to empty Big Red to take the weight off it prior to the move and I am equally confident that Patty won't be motivated enough to do so.  Big Red is going to end up in a ruinous heap, isn't it?

It's never going to get to surgery time.

[Bart Ell]

Bart,

An Estonian grocers opened up here recently.  Large footprint - absolutely stuffed with inventory.  Very pricey.  Don't see how they survive.  That is neither here nor there.  I picked up some Rye Bread.  It's frickin' delicious.  A million times better then Pepperidge Farm and a thousand times better then our local bakery.  What is the bread situation like there in Swaziland?  If it is as good as Estonian Rye bread I think I'd be Super Sized after a year.

They have zopf bread there which is great.
All European bread is better than the crap we have excerpt for Tuscany.
We had a tosta mista in Portugal last week... No idea what kind of bread it was but they somehow make a ham and cheese something you would want to eat every day.

[Bart Ell]

Bart,

I'm making a Wand of Crushing Despair.  I've got a chicken claw, feathers, a dowel and access to a woods.  This leads to many questions.
For the wand part of the wand [not sure of the proper terminology - handle? shaft? pole?]  is it better to use a dowel, sanded smooth and painted black or go out inna wood, find a branch, strip the bark, polish and cover it with varnish?  If I go with the dowel - which would better: Star and Moon decals or Runes of Ruin?  I don't they would work if the varnished branch was used.  Another question is how to attach the chicken claw to the wand part of the wand?  Drill a hole in the end and insert the claw and epoxy it in place?  Or bind everything together with a rustic twine and then harden it with varnish?  Similar question for feather attachment.

As always, thanks.....

When I was 18 I used a 3 foot long 1.25 inch dowel to make a fire stick to do this

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I believe I glued a bunch of cheesecloth at one end.
There was a rather low ceiling in the club and once that flame left my lips it traveled along the ceiling for what seemed like 50 feet.
Nobody died.
This was before The Station nightclub fire and would never be allowed now.
So my advice is to learn to spit fire outdoors and not play with moon stickers.

[JUAN]

Stick from the woods. No varnish, no epoxy, natural not nylon string.  From a reporter I worked with who practiced.  She terrified the kids in the newsroom, but when I told her I saved my chicken bones and knew where to put them, we got along well.

[PB]

Bart,

An Estonian grocers opened up here recently.  Large footprint - absolutely stuffed with inventory.  Very pricey.  Don't see how they survive...

Money laundering front?

[Walks_At_Night]

Stick from the woods. No varnish, no epoxy, natural not nylon string.  From a reporter I worked with who practiced.  She terrified the kids in the newsroom, but when I told her I saved my chicken bones and knew where to put them, we got along well.

Cool.  Yeah it will be for the blue haired, Subaru driving Witch that lives in the house catty corner from ours.  She is trying to put the hoodoo on a politician but her shit isn't working as he just keeps getting stronger.

[Walks_At_Night]

Money laundering front?

Hhhhhmmmm....Could be but around these parts the gobs of mattress stores pretty much had that all sewn up.

[KSM]

Bart's had some stellar answers for you lately. Real stuff, real solutions, not just phoning it in. @Walks_At_Night 


Helps take the pressure off of me. Man you guys bog me down sometimes with all your queer inquiries. I'm only one asshead man.

[Walks_At_Night]

Bart's had some stellar answers for you lately. Real stuff, real solutions, not just phoning it in. @Walks_At_Night 


Helps take the pressure off of me. Man you guys bog me down sometimes with all your queer inquiries. I'm only one asshead man.

Yeah - he's been on fire!

[KSM]

Yeah - he's been on fire!

"On fire" is a slang term for a flamboyant gay man. Perhaps you're better off saying "yeah - he's queer".